Disco pig

Scooter and pig

Want a bit of that!

Hoopla hoopla hoooooopla! Snout! Snout! Wiiiiiggieeeeeee!

Nice, intro there I reckon! How’s it goin’ ‘me trotter tribe? Disco pig be here spinning ‘d platterz what matterz! Well I have been spinning platterz coz Disco Pig get himself a cushy job down at Nando’s. Peri peri nice! I been workin’ and savin’ up for a sweet lookin’ scootae to impress ma sly sty friends. Dat’s ‘d ladies init! Dey be lovin’ a pig wiv wheels.

Anywayz, I been sniffin’ out some musical truffles for yoos. Bang ‘em on ya sound system…

Kevin Crackers and The Spreads – Both ways lead to Evesham

Shania Twine – Man! I feel like a cheese string

Rash Judges – Gavel burns

Tiny Fix – Leaky tap doing my nut in

They Could Be Midgets – Richard Roundtree stole my face but bought me flowers to make amends

Bad Trip – Sesame Street pinball shuffle(Ft. The number 7)

Spooky Fruit – OooooooooOOOoooooooooOOOoooooranges…

The Stoned Moses – G.E.A.R

Jif Marathon – Stupid global brand alignment

Jonny Trialer – Pop goes the Euro (vision)

Lexus Teaspoon Massacre – Got any two-stroke mister?

Bruno Saturn – When I was your Planet

The Barely Bare Bears – Quick Louise! The microwave’s on fire!

Thinking Lizards – Has Brenda found that pair of ornamental bees yet?

Backed a Wrong ‘un – Yes! Yes! Yes! Aw come ON!


Disco Pig

Kitchen Pig

Colander rulez

Diggin’ da piggy! Diggin’ da piggy ! Diggin’ da piggy! SWINE-OVERLORD!

Ya, das right, it Disco pig comin’ atcha like a bag of Fruitella!

Me and ma pig-brudda’s be all tearing up da clubs fo sho and Disco pig, he been spinning da platterz wot matterz iniit? In fact, Disco Pig been spinnin’ other platterz coz he been doin’ Come Dine Wiv Me on the T of V. Last night, Disco Pig had Delroy Pearson from Five Star, Vicki Michelle from dat Allo, Allo and Leonard Fenton who is Mister Dr. Legg from da Eastenders. Disco Pig won wiv his Moroccan inspired Kefta and chips. Dat some tasty dish I laid on them muthas. Fenton was well gutted.

Anywayz, time for Disco Pig to give out me musical advice from his bass-bin of tail-twirlers. Dis gonna mess ya right up!

 

Ramm Jamm and Gran Spam – Feed it some liver and let it live

The Spellbound Toddlers – Bright colours

Fracking Marvelous – Spanklebracelet

The Budleigh Salterton Cruize Party – Bowling green tragedy

Bobby Halitosis – Huffing in ya hand

The Ocelot Bombers – Whispering tramp, proud at heart

They Might be Muffins – Cup cake mix up

Antimacassar – Greasy marks

Toast Float ft. Spanish Graham – Fold them before they crease (ee-zee iron remix)

Consuming the Boat – Even the oars

The Unhappy Camper – Loving in the stoat bunkers

Bum-Taps – Rear ended (by your huge love vehicle)

Incredible Nazi Goldfish – Fish tash and no lighthouse

Miss Kia-Ora – Seven year warranty

Potato Party Ft. PSY – Salty banquet


Disco Pig

Pig in a hat

Well, we had to make it look a bit Festive.

Whaaaaaaaatuuuuupp swifty piggggieeeeees! Yeah, it the X of Mas already and Disco pig, he be as happy about it as a pig in brandy butter.

The pig-crib is ram full of tinsel and ma bruvs, they be out singin’ Carols and grabbin’ some cash for it. Dem boys can hold a descant like swine angels!
So, Disco Pig gonna hit wrap you up with some cataclysmic hoof-thumpas to help ya festivities along. An’ stick a bow on it. Piggy style…

 

The Shoe Horns Ft. Barry Goblin – Smacking the stoat

Alzheimer’s Collective – Do they know it’s Christmas?

Swedish Salmon – Gravlax be thy name

Flute up the shoot – Acolyte gravy

Fat Man Beard – Pulling a Cracker

Neon Orange Tan – The Ballad of Lakeside

Mythical Maps – So here it is. Merry Christmas

Strangely Green Movement – Red wine before bed

The Presents Present Presidents – Daryl’s had all the best biscuits yet again

Derrick Hailstone and the Overwrought Working Party – Mighty are the whelk

Pointing out the Bleeding Obvious – So this is Christmas

Oliver Turkey Baste – Unusual Soup

Chaser Lights – Fuse Trippin’

Made Up Terms – Crowd Sourcing Ideas

Fire Hazard – Stockings by the Fire

 

Well… inspired. I’m sure Disco Pig will be back soon enough in the New Year. So that’s good I suppose.


Disco pig

Disco Pig

Bustin’ outta da hood.

Woop woop piggy swiiiiinnnnggg piggy piggy. Know dat. Yeah dat’s right, da pig is here, bangin on ya ears like a massive snowman of tuuuuuunes! What I mean bruv!

Disco pig, he been layin low for a coupla weeks. Da Solid Hog Crew, dey bin movin in on me patch and kickin up a whole heapa trouble wit ma bruvahs. I been planning a comeback of biblical size man! Gonna hit em wit some of my favourite snout bangers on da weekend. Dem bruvas not gonna know wat hit em! Turn up these tooooooons!

Ghastly Chocolate – Certain it’s carob

Judge in Session – Bang that gavel (to the beat of the drum)

Massive Tea Chest – You say it, I call it, he made it

A Guy Called Key – Show it you’re furious and it’ll back down

Faulty bricks – Kick it like a hamster

Distribution – Moving on out (of the depot)

The Mighty Q Pushers – I think you’ll find I was next

Bastion of Moss – The Kenilworth sessions

Last Chop in the Shop – Lookin’ Good (feeling jaded)

Base Model Vectra – Wind up windows and no alloys

The Kenneth Greasy Project– Ghosts in the windmill

Baritone Rising – Pie floater

Some People – Have no respect (tsk! remix)

The Shoddy Craftsman – Left my drill in the pub again

Sally Silly Sadly Society featuring Heidi-Holes – Chicken fillets

Historic Environments – Dusting the Burmese

Unsolicited Calls – Don’t hang up!

2pm Leaving the Cinema – I expected it to be dark outside

Peter Feet and the Convivial Jugglers – One up, two up, three up…. awwww

 

More top tunes and maybe a double leaning jowler from Disco Pig soon…


Diiiisssscccccoooooo Piiiiiggggg – shuwumna, shuwumna, hum…

It appears Disco Pig has been away… here the man himself picks up the story…

The disco pig

He ain’t nickin’ no Sony X-Plods!

Aiieee – what is da matter wiv dem five-os innit? Disco Pig ain’t been able to update his loyal ungulate followers cos he has been banged up in da slammer innit. On some trumped up charge innit. Dey say, da five-os dat is, dat yours truly was out smashin’ up ‘is hood and rioting an lootin an that when da weather was blazing hotter than blazing squad’s underpants over da weekend. Dey say I knicked two car stereo and dat washing machine innit from Curry’s flecking digical. Disco Pig were nowhere near da joint! Dem stereos were all legally purchased and that for ma sistas birfday. Sheet – Disco Pig ain’t talkin to da haters man – talk to da trotter cos da snout is on holidays, camping in Cornwall or sumfink…sheet

Anydeways er is da bossin, basin toons from my time in da slammer over de summa hear me know my little piglets of passion – get your ear toobes around this stonkers…sheet

 

DJ Vaseline feat MC HardofhearingSmooth it in easy rider

The Sheds of BromleyWhy won’t Rosemary come down from the roof (it’s going to rain)

Machine Gun NoisesAck, ack, ack, shakka, shakka, ack, ack, ack

Trail of SnacksFrazzle, Pork Pie, Wotsit, Wotsit

The MotherflumpersFlump You, Motherflumper

Tinchy TemperIt takes a lot to get me cross, but when I go.. goodness me!

Gastric Band ft The HulkThat’s three ripped shirts this week, I think you’re stressed

The MuggsAre you mugging me off in the mug shop, mug?

The Otter KneesHa ha you fell off your BMX ha ha

Gum Rash feat. DJ CorsodylCan’t eat my vegetables can I go to Bicester now?

Trip to A&ECaught my Jacobs on a slated bench

Banglebert StumpydickEuro, Euro, Euro, Bang, Bang, Bang (Part II)

Lawrence and his Arabian MachineBlowfish sweat, blowfish die

Directions to the chemistTurn right at the roundabout, just next to Budgens

The Acid KingsWeeee are the National Westminster Bank Piggeeeess

DJ ChicksticksIf you don’t, you’ll regret it

MoterhomeThe Ace of Shovels

Fishbender and the wonky finsAmanda, the Findus Crispy Pancakes are too hot

MC Mitchell BrotherIt’s Kelloggs Fruit and Fibre every day

 Mmmm… well ,quite. More phat-tuned porcine piggery-jokery next time folks…..


Disco Pig rock at connecting four… chang! chang!

The disco pig

Connect to da piiiggg

Chang, chang, chang…badawhoop, badawhoop. Ayeiiie it me, Disco Da Friggin’ Pig back in da house to spin you some more of me bangin numbers, my little lean back bacon butties. Gloop, Gloop! What has de world famus Disco Pig been doin dis last week I hear you grunt? Well, woz no more my little mucky piglets cos I iz here to tell ya.  Pin ’em back cos here it is.

Da Disco Pig’s sista, Nightclub Pig came round ma crib last week wiv her little porkers. Dey is da bomb, but still young and finding der trotters in dis difficult world of ours ya know? Anydeways, dey got out da connect four and we had a battle in front of Cash in de Attic on da tellybox. Dem young porkers stink at connecting fours and Disco Pig beat em up bad, real bad wiv a 3-1 win in a best of five…Hah Disco Pig is da boss hog! Chill time now bloods – here is ma selection of top toons from da music scene this week, so burn up a spliff and enjoy – chang, chang!

Gullible Seagulls – Would you stop rubbing it now, Nigel!

Barry Goblin feat. MC Toolkit – Takin’ my barnacle (back to the shop)

The Biscuit Twins – Kung Fu Hymen gonna get you

Twisted Aubergines – No, it’s a not a pear, clearly

Frumpledink Hunglebert – Blackbird’s heart going to break in two

Asthmatic Maths Teachers – Squeezing the chalk

The Secret Gypsys – Can’t find my horse, perhaps it’s gone to Oxford

Amorphous Whores – Money can’t buy you gloves

The Arctic Camcorders – Weasel, weasel, weasel, stoat, stoat, stoat

The Suppository Muffins – Ding Dong Squirrel (gonna ring ya bell)

Subordinate Lemons – Mashin up and mashin down, we are mashin all around

Asbestos Mice Ft. DJ Jacket Potato –  Ships stop at the chip shop for chips, stop

The Scrotum Warriors – Went to the library and popped in to see my sister afterwards

The Cactus Moose –  Hospital beds ain’t what they used to be

George Haemorrhoid – Push it, push it real good

Compulsive Tennis Nets – Can’t get you out of my shed

 More hoof-tapping toons next week yer hear me now?


Disco Pig in sppaaaccceee – music space dat is pig fans!

The disco pig

Da piggieeeeee!

Hoot hoot your hoot, my porcine piggy pals coz I iz back-on da groove with sum more of me razzling, and ruffling ruffty tuffty toons. Aye, it me Disco Pig here to keep your farm as phat as a monkey at monsoon time innit. I az bin away for a bit ya knaw – just burning spliff and chillin wit me brevven in da sty. In fact it bin so chillin me gonna ring MTV and get meself on Cribs – natch they will be renaming it Sties in honour and respec’ to da Disco Pig innit!

Anydeways, dat is enough from me my huge porky scratchings – dis is my latest cullectishon of boss de-boss toons for ya listening pleasure. Get yer ear caverns around dis lot – solid!

Ivory Merchant – Blood is thicker than water, and so is custard

The Exhaust Pipes – Mamma’s gonna try for an injunction

DJ Fiveskin ft. Keith Harris – Asda roll back

Dinglevalve Shumperdank – Euro, Euro, Euro, bang, bang, bang

DJ MG Midget – Handbrake off! It’s Curry Night!

The Souffle Perverts – Soiled bedding is all crispy crème

The Foolish Dictionaries – Arthur’s moved to Hemel Hempstead

MC Torpid and the Slugglish Spoons – Crap ambulance don’t do bends

The Moist Kittens – Fudge, fudge, have you got a van of fudge?

Paul Handsome-Crab – Discharge and dat charge

My Bonnie – Lies over the ocean, unless he’s dead

Throbbing Gristle – Anguished ovens ain’t cooking my pork

Unwellmau5 – Lucozade has pepped me right up

Sack, Back and Quack – Do be do, do be do, be do dooo

The Spittle-heads – The boys are all in my yard, because I do make very nice milkshakes. Second to none!

The Itch Doctors – Rash on your inner thigh

More hoof-tapping toons next week yer hear me now?


Disco pig – I is back my little trotters ai-eeeeeeeee

The disco pig

Da piggieeeeee!

Yo  – what it is my little porcine porkers of love – oh yes, Disco pig is baaackkk wiv more of me hot toons to download right now. Hear what I say – I ain’t being rash (er) dese tracks have been rockin the sty this week and me and Mrs Disco Pig have worn our little trotters out viv all the dancin’ we been doing an dat. Screech them out loud my little truffle sniffers – they are de frazzles…

DJ Terryandjune feat. Anneka Rice – Have you put the cat out, Barry?….Barry? Oh I’ll do it

The Ladyhonkers – Squat and give me ten private

Kaiser Wilhem II – Pointy helmets

The Tea-towel holders feat. Noddy Holder – Congealed but still itchy

Supersonic prostitutes – Everything I do (I do for a tenner)

The Problematic Onions – Parsley is a garnish, bacon is a meat…

The husband embalmers – Appendicitis won’t go away

DJ Kumquat – Loving the horse, Steve, loving it

Barry Toadstool – Lick it until its September 13th

The Automatic Avacadoes – Na na na na na na na na na na na  (every time you go upstairs)

Gary’s got Dandruff – And he smells of wolves

DJ Polly-styrene – I’ll be…(wrapped around your new electrical items)

The Fake Vicars – Tea time for Marjorie


The Charts with Disco Pig

The disco pig

What it is brothers...

Yo,what it is you disco- loving muthas. It’s me Disco Pig, back with the phattest tunes on da phat farm. Hear me now, dese toons are the drizzle my little headphone piglets so get on em while dey is hot to trotter. Can I get a snout out, rewind…come on my little pink players, get em downloaded…dey be the Frazzlest terrrr-acks out there innit….

DJ Budgens Ft. Annabel Croft – Scupper the boat

Suspicious Brownstar – The shed is still locked, George

Basic carrots – Arthur C Clarke

Westside of town Ft. Lionel Blair – Carpet Stains

Arthur C Clarke – Basic Carrots

Can you feel the heat? – Get off the radiator you odious man

DJ Cream T – Jammin on the bread product

Marrissey – Heaven knows I’m in love with bread products

Badsnake – Gone done and bit me on the ass

Findus Crispy Pancakes – Dark side of the pancake

Goobledooble Facemymother – Magnificent Oaks

Whackstain – Arthur loves trains. ok?

The Chlorine Sisters – Swimming Trunks, rock, swimming trunks roll

Fast Freddy and Barry Goblin – Tracks of my ears