Rock stars in the morning…
Number 288: Carter the Unstoppable Sex Machine
CARTER’S MUM: Carter! Carter love? Are you getting up today?
CARTER: Nah, not today mum!
CARTER’S MUM: Oh, haven’t you got school today love?
CARTER: No, free period!
CARTER’S MUM: Oh, I see
CARTER’S MUM: What are you doing up there love?
CARTER: Having some sex Mum!
CARTER’S MUM: Oh…. Are you going to have some breakfast dear?
CARTER: Sorry Mum, can’t stop
CARTER’S MUM: Oh, okay then
More rock icon morning nincompoopery next time folks!
Rock stars in the morning
Number 78: Bob Geldof
Bob Geldof’s mum: “Come on Robert, get up now, it’s time for school’’
Bob Geldof: “Aww bleedin hell ma, it’s too early.”
Bob Geldof’s mum: “Come on – the Curiously Cinnamon is already in the bowl going soggy”
Bob Geldof: “Aw Jaysus ma. Ma?”
Bob Geldof’s mum: “Yes Robert?”
Bob Geldof: “What day is it today?”
Bob Geldof’s mum: “Oh, well it’s erm… Tuesday Robert, it’s Tuesday.”
Bob Geldof: “It had better not be Monday ma…”
Bob Geldof’s mum: “Of course it’s not, it’s erm definitely Tuesday, yes Tuesday. Now hurry up.”
Bob Geldof: “Okay ma, I’m coming, as it’s Tuesday….”
More rock icon early morning slash breakfast time fun next time folks!
Number 4: Alice Cooper
Alice Cooper’s Dad: Hey Alice, did ya sleep well champ?
Alice Cooper: Not so good Dad. Not so good…
Alice Cooper’s Dad: Is it the nightmares again son?
Alice Cooper: Yeah, the big boys were chasing me again and this time, they almost caught me.
Alice Cooper’s Dad: Aww son, I feel for you I sure do. Did you bring your bedding down with ya sport?
Alice Cooper: Yeah Dad… sorry….
Alice Cooper’s Dad: Don’t be sorry son. It’s just a phase big guy.
Bless… He was a troubled youth wasn’t he eh? More completely spurious Rock Star post-nocturnal tales soon folks!
No. 3: Axl Rose
Rock Star Axl Rose’s mom: Axl honey? Axl? Time for school honey!
Rock star Axl Rose: Awww mom….I’m trying real hard to comb my hair….
Rock Star Axl Rose’s mom: Come on honey, or you’ll miss your lift! Do you want me to do your hair sweetums?
Rock star Axl Rose: Yes please mom… Shucks! It sure is hard to comb.
Rock Star Axl Rose’s mom: And red honey…. You’ve always had such lovely, soft red hair…..
Such a nice polite young man wasn’t he? More entirely made-up flashbacks into rock stars’ childhood mornings soon folks!
Rockstars in the morning…
No.2: Phil Collins
Phil Collins’ Mum: “Phil Collins!….Phil Collins!…come on you’ll be late for school. Are you getting up, it’s 7.45!”
Phil Collins: “Yes, mum, I’m just coming…”
Phil Collins’ Mum: “In the air tonight love?”
Phil Collins: “No….I am just coming down for breakfast.”
Phil Collins’ mum: “What do you want? Sugar Puffs or Crunchy Nut Bites?”
Phil Collins: “Erm…Sugar Puffs”
Phil Collins’ mum: “Please…”
Phil Collins: “Please….”
Phil Collins mum: “Good boy Phil Collins, good boy.”
More morning musical mayhem next time, folks!
No1: Billy Idol
ROCKSTAR BILLY IDOL’S MUM: Rockstar Billy Idol! ….Rockstar Billy Idol!….. Its 8.15, you’ll be late for school. Are you getting up?
ROCKSTAR BILLY IDOL: “No”
Next week more morning related shenanigans with music stars from across the globe!