Restaurant de limpieza un cerdo minuciosamente

Nebraska! Here are the votes of the Belgian people….

This week, Le Restuarant de limpieza un cerdo minuciosamente is throbbed to present its special Grange Hill menu. Served daily after school just before Newsround.

Pour le mains….

  • Eradicated Owl feet in a Gripper Stebson sauce, served with the droppings of anti-aircraft guns. Served on a mattress of mattresses and lightly whisked until turgid
  • Gopher juice, gently encouraged from a thousand lactating gophers. Skewered and heavily mated over a slow, slow, quick, quick, slow flame
  • Swimming pool for hire – no petting in the deep end. Comes with bronzed lifeguard and set of trunks. Fork optional
  • Belly jelly – haughty blackbird stomachs folded in two and set for hours in Celia Imrie’s fridge. Comes with set of brake lights, and a subscription to Slap My Husband magazine
  • Quartered fresh badger paws. Stuffed with David Coleman peppers and rhubarbs which have been forced to carry out random crime sprees on newsagents throughout South East London, against their will
  • Stripped and beaten beef steaks, served in a Bob Monkhouse style sauce. Served during re-runs of the Benny Hill Show.

And pour le Puddings? 

  • Ginger Gonch cake, bullied thoroughly and told it has no future. Served with pant cream and fried hamsters

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