Poetry corner. A bit like one of those yoghurt fruit corner things but with poetry instead of yoghurt. And the fruit corner bit.

Minted Sauce

By Sophie Jumpersforgoalposts

Good morning little lamb have you sent that email yet?

And what about that spreadsheet? You haven’t even started it I bet…

What about that report for the chairman of the board? Come on, get it done!

And once you’ve done that I have some errands for you to run

We’ve got a meeting in an hour, have you prepared the lengthy agenda?

What’s the matter with you today, you lazy little blighter…

Come ON little lamb your appraisal is later today,

We have some feedback for you little lamb, about training and your pay

You need to show your finance skills and that you can work out the VAT

This is low hanging fruit for you lamb! Surely you realise that?

Oh!

But his hooves, his hooves, his tiny cloven hooves,

Are supposed to be used for trotting on grass

Not renewing his monthly security pass

His hooves, his hooves, his tiny cloven hooves, so often they do fail

He can’t even open Outlook, let alone send any mail

His hooves, his hooves, his tiny cloven hooves

They can’t input data or create a PDF,

Come ON little lamb get it done, my god are you deaf?

Little lamb, little lamb, I want to see you in my office

We thought you were a senior pro, when clearly you’re a novice

Oh little lamb, little lamb to them you are just an ovine resource

Now shut up and get in the oven while we prepare the minted sauce…