Poetry corner
Posted: 12/03/2013 Filed under: Poetry corner | Tags: Bill Oddie, Ford Escort, kestrels, syrup 4 CommentsSugared Kestrels
by Bertram R Crumpet
I think I’m in love with Bill Oddie,
It’s not his beard or sinewy body
No, it’s not either of those as nice as they are
It’s not his Ford Escort although that is a nice car
What I love about Bill Oddie
Is the way he chortles and chirrups
Every time he pours out the syrup
So glad is he of the sugary snack
You’d think it was a lump of crack
Ah Bill Oddie and your sweet-toothed habit
He’s not a fan of a weasel or a rabbit
No it’s birds that he has on his brain
An owl, an ostrich or maybe a crane
Perhaps on a robin he should pour
Some syrup or sugar – more and more
His recipe is bound to be a hit….
Sugared kestrels and a caramelised tit
monkeybroth 
Ooh I love Bill Oddie s sugared tits
But it’s Bellamy s bits I dream of
As I pour my maple wit
Aj of hassocks
It’s the beard though isn’t it.. all scratchy and yet somehow and in a strange way alluring and attractive. Manly but also caring and a place for kittens to hole up for the winter. Stay strong AJ stay strong :0
…and the little bits of cheese,
hidden in his fronds,
When cheese less fridge
stares …
empty back
I know the beard will stem my lack…
One love!
Taken from the poem ‘A cupboard of beard’
Cupboard of beard is a classic. Loved it since we studied it for A-level. If there’s a finer piece of prose than ‘and the little bits of cheese hidden in his fronds, when cheese less fridge stares empty back’ then Monkeybroth is yet to hear it. Damn straight….